Five Key Communication Tips For Planning Your Wedding
“The single biggest problem in communication is
the illusion that it has taken place.”
-George Bernard Shaw
While everyone talks about the importance of communication in a marriage you don’t hear much about the lines of communication when planning a marriage. Remember your marriage habits start during the wedding planning process, form good communication habits early on and it will be much easier for you as your marriage moves forward. Many people don’t realize how important it is to make sure that you communicate effectively with your bridal when planning your wedding. Everyone knows that the bride is usually the one that does all of the wedding planning. What some brides don’t seem to realize is that they need to make sure that all of their information is communicated well with the grooms. Otherwise your wedding day could end up in sheer disaster. In order to make sure that everyone knows what is going on then you will need to follow the following steps.
First – make sure that you have regular meetings that can update the bridal party on what is going on. This should be done at least once a month (or once a week if you are having a very quick engagement) . Most brides and grooms will choose who they want to be in their bridal party, well in advance of their wedding. For some this could be as early as six months in advance. Obviously this means that you need to keep in communication with everyone over that period of time. If there is a specific job that you want each individual in your wedding to take care of then you will need to make sure that they know what their responsibilities are. This will help to avoid any stress on your wedding day. Some brides will even take the time to write up a six month itinerary to let them know what you need to get accomplished or what you would like them to help you to accomplish. Keeping everything organized and everyone informed will make your wedding day so much more enjoyable. Also, keep the groom involved. It is his wedding too. Make sure the groom feels a part of the planning and is even responsible for certain things. While it may be the brides “Dream Wedding” we can’t tell you how many times we have seen upset grooms because they had no say in anything.
Second – It is also important that you communicate well with the parents of both the bride and the groom. They need to know what is going on and who will be doing what. This will help to make sure that they don’t end up causing problems on the wedding day, by changing things. If you let them know what is going on they will feel involved and know that you have everything that you want for your day. Most parents just want to make sure that your day goes as smoothly as possible. You should take the time to let your parents know where you want them to be and what they will be responsible to do on the day of your wedding. If they are helping to pay for things then make sure they give you a budget and by no means never go over budget without chatting with them first.
Photo By Swensen Photography
Third- There should be no surprises when it comes to who is paying for what. If you, yourself are not paying for something DO NOT just assume that it will be taken care of. Not only is this unfair to the vendor who shouldn’t have to chase money anyway it is extremely unfair to the person who gets stuck with the bill. I can’t tell you how many times we have seen vendors having to call 4-5 different people to collect. It is extremely uncomfortable for the vendor, it is extremely embarrassing for the person telling them they aren’t responsible and it is just plain inconsiderate. Please make sure that if there are different people paying for different things they give you the okay for it and they are given the date by which it needs to be paid. Then follow up with them to make sure your vendors are paid in a timely manner.
Fourth – Communicate with your vendors. Never assume they will just show up and be there. Typically a good wedding professional will break down every service you are getting, including delivery times, set up times, scheduled shoot times etc etc. NEVER assume a photographer or videographer will or can stay longer than the scheduled time, never assume your chauffeur will just wait around for an hour if things are running over. Be courteous of their time, if things are running over make sure you compensate them for it. If they go the extra mile make sure you tip them for it. But most importantly get everything in writing. They will honor everything that is written down, beyond that they don’t owe you anything extra (harsh I know, but true). Plus it will protect you if there is something they said they would do but didn’t. It protects both parties.
Also, if you have hired a wedding planner (highly recommended) make sure you are constantly in touch with them. A good planner will make sure all lines of communication are open between all parties as well as vendors. This person will become your greatest adviser, closest confidant and best friend over your engagement period.
Fifth – Post Wedding Thank Yous are extremely important. Following up with a nice little gift or thank you note to those who volunteered their time to make your wedding great is just as important as anything you do prior to the wedding. These people donated their time, talents and money to help you have a great wedding. Showing proper appreciation is paramount. Also, even though you paid your vendors it would be wise (and extremely helpful to them) to send them a thank you note telling them how much you loved working with them (assuming you did). Testimonials from clients are extremely valuable in helping a vendor build and grow their business and they are much appreciated.
Also, DO NOT forget to send out Thank You Cards. A tradition that is slowing going away. If someone is willing to spend money on a gift of even send you money in the mail, you need to find the time to send them a thank you note. It is all too common these days that young brides and grooms get busy and don’t do it. Set aside an hour a day or a couple hours a week to write them and get them sent out. It matters to a lot of people and is the proper thing to do.
Photo By Garzand Photography
The bottom line is that it is important to remember that communication really is the key to making sure that your wedding day goes as smoothly as possibly. Not only will the bride and groom enjoy themselves, but so will all of your guest. Being able to keep organized for such a big event really is as simple as keeping the lines of communication open.
Contributing sources – Yahoo.com, theweddingchannel.com